Upset. Upset. Upset. As if I just missed the KTM commuter from Port
Klang station to KL Sentral station. Waiting for the next train is like waiting
for a month, terribly severe, like hell! Is it like breaking up with my
sweetheart? I guess not.
It’s too late already. No point of regretting any more. Even if I wept
for hours. The result will never change, ever! The imperfection of the most
hoped PMR candidate’s result has caused the Senior Assistant of Administration,
Cikgu Nana to be fucking unhappy.
It has destroyed, ruined the school’s ‘aspiration’ to see a straight-A student this year. Let alone the subject is English. The subject whose teacher
is me! It’s me! Can you hear that?
Oh Allah the Almighty. Like the whole world’s looking at me right now.
Telling me off. Blaming me. Cursing at me.
“What the fuck have you done, Cikgu? What on
earth did you teach your students? Did you ask them to fool around in class? Oh
boy, I’m asking you to help teach them to score English, idiot!”
It’s proven! I failed to make their dream come true. Even if I
wasn’t even the PMR candidate.
The obvious feeling of disappointment could be seen on my cute
face as soon as I woke up from bed, pressing the UNLOCK button on my cell phone
after identifying that there was an sms sent to me that morning. Shortly
after that, I inserted the phone security code and then pressed the OK button.
I was so freaking overwhelmed by the feeling of eagerness. So much. Eager
to find out who the sender was and what the entire content of the sms was all
about. I whereupon pressed the VIEW button.
What’s shown on the phone screen was an sms sent by Cikgu Effie, a BM
teacher. Which went, “Congrats. Harlister awak dapat 6A 1C.”
Harlister Iwan (First row, second from left, wearing a red blazer)
I who previously seemed half drowsy, immediately, fully awake! My eyes
which looked pretty hard to open just now were widely open at present. Completely
focused. Getting more enthusiastic. As if I just came across a beautiful angel
from the Paradise. Wow! My eyes didn’t blink for about 10 seconds, you know.
My feeling? Between psyched and dejected. Dunno which one, exactly. I
myself feel uncertain about my feeling at the moment. Strangely, a bit thrilled
and couldn’t wait to spread the good news to the best student on my own. But,
all of a sudden, the intention was to be called off.
“Entah-entah, dia dah tau kot. Tapi, kenapa tak sms
kat aku pun?” I wondered, feeling slightly bewildered. “In
your dreams. Apa? Penting sangat ke aku ni pada dia?” I condemned
myself, sarcastically.
Yet…it sounds odd. The student practically texts me so often. Every
single day! “Takkanlah berita baik macam tu tak nak maklum kat aku langsung kot?”
I make some assumption, continuously. “Maybe, he wants me to inquire him myself,”
I thought. Some people turn to be like that. Sometimes. I guess. Because one of
these sort of people is me. Ahaks. Or maybe, he wants to make it a surprise.
Eh?
The feeling of agog was yet undone, fancying finding it out in detail. I
whereupon pressed the OPTION button, selected ‘Reply’, was typing “Apa C tu?”
At the moment, that was such a simple question. Soalan cepumas. Just
like ‘What’s our country’s name?’ Huhu. But even so, I got a little too
obstinate, asking for the confirmation. A fact. Most importantly, I’ll get what
I eagerly want! I behaved truly like a small kid. Ouch!
Before Cikgu Effie replied to the sms, I who felt damn impatient
(though I know, patience is a part of faith), hastily pressed CALL button on
the cell phone, making a call. Like making an emergency call or something. Hadn’t
taken my bath yet… oops pecah rahsia! LOL.
Doing a sum, we both were on the phone for more than 5
minutes long. In sum, I’m so freaking ‘delighted like hell’ since, after all, I
didn’t even eventually learn what grade C was. An enormous waste of credit, I
sighed. L
But, at least, there’s another info I’ve known about. Even it sounded less
significant to me. Actually, I’ve to say I’m really proud of the satisfactory
achievement of BM paper. According to Cikgu Effie, BM evidently increased this
year and all passed. That’s good. After all her hard work teaching extra
classes at nights over the last week prior to the PMR, her effort was finally paid.
Worth! Cikgu Effie, congratulations! You deserved it. What about a promotion?
Heehee… J
Had I held so many extra classes as she did, you
think, would my students also pass English with flying colours? I made a silly
speculation. For sure, I’m not silly, anyway.
HOT news! HOT news! As hot news as Siti Nurhaliza tying the knot. I
couldn’t yet calm myself down, though. The mysterious C. Is it true that the C
is English? Since my heart strongly convinced me that I was right. “Mampus!”
The unexpected word suddenly came out of my mouth. L
The name of the Senior Assistant 1 crossed my mind by coincidence. Without
further ado, I searched her number, tried to drop her a line. The intention of
saving my phone credit was to be forgotten for the time being. Don’t be so
mean, people.
Meantime, I must keep myself noted. Although it’s merely for my
student’s PMR exam result. Not even mine! I sat the PMR in the last 10 years. No
way. I’m getting old now.
You’d the smartest one to predict what I procured
after making her a call and guess what? Um….very unexpectedly, she herself had
no idea what the bloody C was. Sigh. My phone credit. L
Things sounded even worse when she too suspected that the C had to be English.
And, once again, “Mampus! I’m dead!” I couldn’t help blaming myself. By
listening to her expression, she was freaking dejected. With me?
Erm…she felt dissatisfied, visibly. Just because her ‘aspiration’ to see
a straight A student, at least one, has met a failure. She must be freaking
upset. I can tell.
What about me? The result let me down too, you know. I
failed. I failed. How depressing!
“Could be I’d been taking my teaching for granted. And THIS is the price I
gotta pay back! The quality of my next year’s teaching is to be improved. Learn
from the past mistake. Promise that I shan’t let it happen again. Once bitten,
twice shy,” I’m reflecting myself. Earnestly. Obviously, I regretted.
Hmm…let bygones be bygones. I’ll put much effort in order to ensure such
things won’t ever happen any more. I’ll help the smart student out even though
he’ll be transferring to another school. I’ll consistently keep him motivated
so he’ll never give up in studies. He surely can. Besides, he’s not a loser. Like
who I am. I know.
I wish him ‘break a leg’ on the SPM. But then…um, never mind.
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